The Vampire Who Ate Bawang Putih For Breakfast

this story is originally written by Nussow , an adaptation from Crapola,

and visualized by Candy and Some Grass.

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little bit of info before we start okay?

this is Mr Val. he is a vampire.

he lives in Malaysia since he was small but he's Caucasian.

and this is the present time.

eventhough you are living in different time zone or you are in different era,

this is the present time while you are reading this.

got it?

this is an important time setting as this is the time Mr Val died.

lets start shall we?

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Mr Val rush in to his room without even have to open the door. well, this is because Mr Val's room doesn't have a door. he broke it not long ago because he was rushing to avoid from the sunlight. while he is in his room, he is thinking about what to eat as he is so fucking hungry.

he tries to distract himself for not thinking about food by reading the newspaper. however, he keeps on imagining all the human in the paper as food. dammit, tak boleh jadi ni.

Mr Val goes to the kitchen to find some food. he look everywhere around the kitchen. the house is not actually his. he took the house after the owner of the house is dead. how he died, Mr Val refuses to tell but he swear he didn't kill him. so luckily, he found some roti bawang putih in one if the cupboard.

then Mr Val happily took a shower. he says its not good having shower after meal, nanti perut buncit. although he is very hungry but he takes well care of his hygiene. while taking his shower,

he sing songs. he's quite good at it as he knows various kind of song. up from Lady Gaga till Shah Rukh Khan songs.

after take a good shower, he dress up well. he wears clean shirt, put on some powders, spray some deodorant, comb his hair neatly and even wear eyeliner. dia rasa dia lah vampire paling style sekali!

he opens up the packaging and smells the bread. seems like he knows the smell but he cant recall. perhaps because he is too hungry.

hell with the strange smell, he took the first bite and he chews the food slowly.

he took another bite. boleh tahan jugak rasa dia.

his respiratory system seems not to be functioning. he tries to reach for water but its too far. his eyes starts watery. damn! damn!! dammnn!!!

Mr Val collapses. each and every person he love or he ate before appears in front of his eyes. oh, bye bye world. bye bye Malaysia.

THE END.

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145 years before.

notakaki: ada sesiapa tak faham?

notakakikaki: Mr V is real, people. he's a pirate and a part time vampire.

POTA 2 : The Dead Man's Brain

directed by Candy and Some Grass.

presenting you :

this is not a pirate story, but it is a story about pirates.

let it begins.

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there is a story behind the greatest-ship-ever Bella Luna. the story sounded more or less like this. long ago, Bella Luna was owned by the most fearless pirate of the universe and when he died, he doesn't want anybody to own his precious Bella Luna. thus, he send Bella Luna straight down to the deep blue sea.

deep down where the water is not so blue but not so black and the fishes are much scarier. Bella Luna was left there for more than 1000 years. yup, she's old. but pretty mind you.

how did Captain Hanis Manis got the ship? oh no no, she didn't swim till down there. be realistic you guys. she made a deal with the Walking Dutchman.

well now, who the hell is Walking Dutchman? let me tell you about him. Walking Dutchman is the guardian of the sea. he is like the king of sea or perhaps the Prime Minister. his job is to serve to the sea forever. he has to collect the missing souls that was dead in the sea and bring them to the world's end. he is mortal and he lives on the sea or maybe sometimes under the sea with his pet, the giant jelly fish, Mr Jelly-O'.

to make it sound more tragic, once someone has volunteered to be the Walking Dutchman, there is no way of turning back. he will only get the chance to go to the land once in 10 years. people even says, there this chest called 'the dead man's chest' that bound Walking Dutchman to the sea.

according to the law of sea, the person who wants to be the Walking Dutchman has to give up his brain and live on the sea as a dead man with no fear, no lust, not even brain- eternity.

so, coming back to the story on how Captain Hanis Manis gets Bella Luna, she made a deal with the Walking Dutchman somewhere in October when the Walking Dutchman was on his one-day-holiday.

that's how Captain Hanis Manis gets Bella Luna. she have made a bloody promise that she shouldn't have.

10 years passed..

Captain Hanis Manis was too busy chasing Captain Nakajima that stole Bella Luna from her. remember how she got back her ship in POTA 1? yah, well that's after 4 years he stole the ship. and after she got the ship, she was too busy finding treasure in the sea. she had totally forgotten about the promise.

one day in October, she had a dream.

when she woke up, she realizes that she is short of time because at this time, she only has 1 and a half soul. oh dammit.

she stay at shore for weeks to hide from the Walking Dutchman because she knew he cant touch the land. but soon, she was getting bored and tired of hiding. she is a pirate, she cant stay at land forever, yes? so, she finds a way to cut the deal.

she heard some says that, if you keep the dead man's chest, the Walking Dutchman will be under your command. and if you stab the brain, you will be mortal. meaning, you will be the next Walking Dutchman. guess what? Captain Hanis Manis decided to search for the chest. to keep or to stab, that is undecided yet.

she search for it everywhere on land, including at the Octoberfest in Amsterdam. but she couldn't find it. she know she had to sail to the sea to find it, somehow.

what she doesn't know is, the government side, Putrajaya, has already have the chest. ahhh, damn. how do they get it? well, i dont know. ask them. but what i know is why they have it. this is because they hold a grudge towards Captain Hanis Manis (remember the case about the stolen "Downwiththebloodycops' in POTA 1?) but they couldn't catch her. unfortunately, they happen to know about the deal between Captain Hanis Manis and the Walking Dutchman. so they know, only the Walking Dutchman can catch her. in order to make the Walking Dutchman follows their command, they have to keep the chest.

coming back to Captain Hanis Manis, she sail to the sea to find the chest. when she is in the middle of the sea, she knew that it was the day she would die. but she rather die in the sea than die hiding on the land. courage isn't it?

her instinct were true. that was the day Captain Hanis Manis died. she was eaten by Mr. Jelly-O' and were send straight to the world's end along with Bella Luna.

she should have swim to the bottom of the sea in getting Bella Luna in the first place, no?

THE END.

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notakaki: sorry for the late entry and thanks for waiting.

notakakikaki: i wont promise when is POTA 3 but there will be POTA 3. :)

when there are 3 hours left...

adrenaline-rush, blood-rush, sweat-rush.

panicked. finger crossed.

this is it, the time has come.

make up has been put on.

costume are hanged.

settings have been set up.

"audio ready? stage manager ready? pelakon ready? 1001, 1002, 1003, 1004, 1005... light on!"

notakaki: 3 weeks of training. this is the time to prove something, aye? wish me luck people. coz when comes to certain time, luck counts.

notakakikaki: bukan entri ni yang perlu ditunggu. tapi entri selepas ini. entri ini hanya untuk menghilangkan perasaan nervous yang tidak dapat dibendung.

i'm savvy. :D

hahahahahahahaahahahahahahahahahahahahaha.

sekarang blog saya dah ada chat box. anda tidak boleh kata saya noob lagi.

sekian terima kasih.

notaakaki: tolong tunggu next entri okay? :)

pergi sesat!!

you have to be a little zero minded to understand this. perhaps, a little transparent.

**********************************

stop asking whether i'm okay or not.

dont bother if i look pale.

or maybe look like i'm sick to death.

or even better look like a retarded zombie.

i'm just perfectly, perfectly fine. :)

Johnny Christopher Depp #3

heart you.

Charlie and the Chocolate Factory [2005]

"for your information, whipped cream isn't whipped cream at all unless it's been whipped with whips."

isn't that clever? haha. krim sebat yang disebat oleh penyebat.

Johnny as Willy Wonka is the genius chocolatier that can make chocolate ice cream that will never melt, make a river and a waterfall out of chocolate and grass that taste like candy!

well, it is not just something.

it is 'something' something of any something that's ever been.

-Willy Wonka

i'm so not pretty. i'm short, skinny and my hair is fake.

be prepared for an ultimate vain-ness.

i know what's in your mind people, just spit it out.

UPDATES: kalau ikot Julian's calender, my birth date is on 2448559.5. haha

UPDATES: nak tahu anda punya? sila klik sini. terima kasih aphorism. :)

UPDATES: my life path is no 6 and it says there; in either any relationship or romance, i'm loyal, devoted and trustworthy. (?) well, that's irony. fuck it.

UPDATES: i have tendency to be too hard on myself. (?) no i'm not. i guess i'm not. well, maybe just a little bit.

Johnny Christopher Depp #2

heart you.

Cry Baby [1990]

in this movie, Johnny Depp as Wade Walker or known as Cry Baby is the group leader of the Cry Baby gang. a very sexy one, indeed.

its a very twisted movie where i thought its about fighting and murdering or maybe gangsterism but no, its a movie about music, stereotyping and love. awwwwwwww.

in Cry Baby, we can see Johnny in......

damn sad, innocent expression.

damn hot, sexy flirtation.

damn singing band.

and damn yes, he dance.

all i did is loving her.

if that's a crime, then i'll stand convicted.

-Cry Baby